35 Gifts: Day 2
Jan. 1st, 2010 11:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jeshyrIt was a glorious day for the first day of 2010. I had a really great day, despite some hiccups that could have upset my mood. The weather was lovely and I was able to sit outside on the step near my bed for just a few minutes which always makes me very happy.
I felt like I spent the whole day thinking about giving! I thought about how almost all my gifts have to be facilitated or actually carried out by somebody else (because of being bedridden), and I'm not sure how I feel about the way that changes gift giving. I've ordered an audio version of Carie's original 29 Gifts book to read, and I don't have a non-fiction book on the go just now so I'll start reading it as soon as I get access to it.
Because I was thinking about giving, I finally looked up a website to use to replace Kiva as I don't agree with some of the things their management is doing. It looks like United Prosperity will work best for me, which I'm pleased about. While asking, I inadvertently triggered somebody else to resume their use of the site which felt nice too!
I was feeling at a bit of a loss about possible gifts which are economically and physically feasible for me so I looked around on the 29 gifts website and found a great thread about simple gifts to give which I found very inspiring. I'm still bothered by the fact I can't physically manage most things without somebody else doing 90% of the work - is it still my gift? Philosophical question, really, but it matters to me.
Today's gifts:
I also taught T to make mini-quiches. This was mostly for my own benefit as I wanted them for dinner and she didn't know how, but I have a project of teaching her quick and easy meals as she has a strange idea she can't cook. Not sure who or what convinced her she can't cook, as she's quite capable - although lacking in experience and knowledge because she hasn't tried. She was so pleased with them that we took a photo of the finished product to prove to her family she really made them :). This made me think more about the double-directionality of gifts. Even the most anonymous leaves the giver with a warm fuzzy "I did something good" feeling. So in each gifting transaction (each transaction full stop?) both the giver and the recipient benefit in multiple ways (emotionally, possibly financially or physically etc., depending on the nature of the gift). Is there an amount of benefit to the giver where we stop calling it a "gift" and call it something else? If I get as much out of the giving as the person who receives it is that still a gift? What if I get more benefit?
Is it perhaps the intention that matters more than the outcome? If I teach you to bake me quiches simply because I want a quiche, is that less of a gift than if I teach you to bake quiches because I know you'd love to learn - even though the tangible benefits are the same in both cases? I think intention counts for at least something.
A thoughtful Ricky
I felt like I spent the whole day thinking about giving! I thought about how almost all my gifts have to be facilitated or actually carried out by somebody else (because of being bedridden), and I'm not sure how I feel about the way that changes gift giving. I've ordered an audio version of Carie's original 29 Gifts book to read, and I don't have a non-fiction book on the go just now so I'll start reading it as soon as I get access to it.
Because I was thinking about giving, I finally looked up a website to use to replace Kiva as I don't agree with some of the things their management is doing. It looks like United Prosperity will work best for me, which I'm pleased about. While asking, I inadvertently triggered somebody else to resume their use of the site which felt nice too!
I was feeling at a bit of a loss about possible gifts which are economically and physically feasible for me so I looked around on the 29 gifts website and found a great thread about simple gifts to give which I found very inspiring. I'm still bothered by the fact I can't physically manage most things without somebody else doing 90% of the work - is it still my gift? Philosophical question, really, but it matters to me.
Today's gifts:
- I gave extra thanks and hugs to Dad when he acted as my "Knight In Shining Armour" and came to unblock my washing machine for me. Told him about the Knight part and he laughed :)
- I stayed extra still when the cat was sleeping on my chest, even when I would otherwise have moved. He got lots of extra hugs - he gives me so very much every single day.
- Made up an amusingly official looking "Certificate Of Wonderfulness" which looked like the sort of certificate you get upon completing an academic course, and addressed it to tonight's carer (it was T) and gave it to her with as much pomp and ceremony as one can conjure up with no other props while lying in bed. She was most touched and gave me a hug. She was still grinning when she left, which was nice.
I also taught T to make mini-quiches. This was mostly for my own benefit as I wanted them for dinner and she didn't know how, but I have a project of teaching her quick and easy meals as she has a strange idea she can't cook. Not sure who or what convinced her she can't cook, as she's quite capable - although lacking in experience and knowledge because she hasn't tried. She was so pleased with them that we took a photo of the finished product to prove to her family she really made them :). This made me think more about the double-directionality of gifts. Even the most anonymous leaves the giver with a warm fuzzy "I did something good" feeling. So in each gifting transaction (each transaction full stop?) both the giver and the recipient benefit in multiple ways (emotionally, possibly financially or physically etc., depending on the nature of the gift). Is there an amount of benefit to the giver where we stop calling it a "gift" and call it something else? If I get as much out of the giving as the person who receives it is that still a gift? What if I get more benefit?
Is it perhaps the intention that matters more than the outcome? If I teach you to bake me quiches simply because I want a quiche, is that less of a gift than if I teach you to bake quiches because I know you'd love to learn - even though the tangible benefits are the same in both cases? I think intention counts for at least something.
A thoughtful Ricky
no subject
Date: 2010-01-01 08:47 pm (UTC)